Late Night Thoughts (vol. 1)

As I sit here at 1:35 AM on a Sunday morning, with a lot of thoughts in mind I decided to do something I haven’t done in a while: write to the readers. I have focused on poems and poetry as a means of expression because it has been fluid, clear and interesting. But it is good to stir the pot from time to time. This is the middle of May, and a lot has happened since my last blog post. By no means will this be a journal of my life or a world events type of post, but a quick summary wouldn’t hurt. Prince has died from a prescription drug overdose, fires at Fort McMurray, Trump dominance, Drake has “Views” and so forth. My life has been the same and that’s pathetic. Where am I going with this? I want to analyze the value of change. A lot of us take it for granted, change is amazing. We walk through this world expecting a routine in our lives. Wake up, brush teeth, shower, dress up, work (or school), back home, relax (0r homework), sleep, repeat. It’s sad. We are afraid of change. It’s something we want but fear. It’s been a theme that’s been surrounding my head ever since 2016 started, the desire of change but the fear of it as well. I can only speak about myself but have you ever felt that change was something you need but were not ready to take? It is like that assignment or project that is due but you keep pushing it off as if it will magically create and finish itself. It’s that text you thought you sent but got distracted by something else. It’s that song you said you would look up but forgot about it. That is what change is.

We all want change. It’s something I’ve been looking for recently. We all want to climb that mountain and face that challenge, to get uncomfortable. The issue with change is that it involves vulnerability, a trait that many people try to hide. A lot of young people (below 25 typically) have a large fear of being vulnerable. I’m not speaking for everyone, I’m just speaking for the Ottawa, Canadians I know (small number of people). That’s the real reason we are afraid of change. I believe in John Locke’s philosophy of tabula rasa, we are all born a “blank slate” but the experiences we have and the influence we get from our environment suppresses our natural adventurous spirit. We are afraid of being vulnerable. I am one example of this. We are afraid of looking “soft” so we hide behind a mirror of consistency. We follow an imaginary line that we created. A line of how we “should” act, what we “should” do and who we “should” do it with. We are afraid of looking weak, when the strongest people are the ones that embarced change. We build a wall of routine, chill in a Jacuzzi habits within a home of comfort while never trying to change the setting. Once we build this land we are afraid of that big unknown, change. We are fascinated by it, like a zoo animal but we look and don’t touch. This isn’t a critique of our generation, this is not a critique of our city, our people, our country, our culture, it’s an observation of how people are. It is a mirror I’m placing on my own face. That life is more than what we construct. It is about the unknown.

We are not guaranteed a day on this earth, we are not promised life. We live in an ever changing speck of dust in the universe and we have arrogance to stay the same. Nah bro, that ain’t for me. So get uncomfortable, do weird things, go on adventures because that is what life is meant for. We will all be eaten by worms, decompose and return to dirt but before that happens we must constantly try to change. As I write this at 2:08am on a Sunday morning, I want all of us to change from our way of thinking to our way of life.

Goodnight beloved




4 thoughts on “Late Night Thoughts (vol. 1)

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