Some thoughts that ring through a 2:33am mind aren’t simple to write down. We could play the generic super emotional sad nostalgic “i’m alone” card but that’s played out. We could talk about fears and anxiety but that’s also a useless overplayed record…why are you reading this (and why am I writing this)? Because there’s a message behind this and if you follow me down this journey you’ll find it and maybe find yourself in this journey.
Recently I’ve been looking at what the meaning of friendship is, and as abstract and simple as that may be, it has occupied my mind. We have them, we need them and they need us, that’s the biggest part of being human. This lead me to expand and try to understand what a soulmate and what a lifemate are. When these thoughts decided to run in my head I did what anyone would do: I asked my friends. For the most part they said that a lifemate and soul mate are essentially the exact same thing, and to be real I didn’t agree with any of em’. I like understanding things, especially when they peak my interest so I went to check out this dope ass youtuber/sexologist Shan Boody who essentially broke down soulmate as someone who grasps an intense close connection while a lifemate is someone in your life forever that will support your “journey”. No one has explained my feelings on such words any better than Boody.
We are raised in a society (especially with media pressures) that constantly tries to “pair” us up, couples and relationships are literally “goals”. We have been raised to believe that marriage is that thing we gotta do, to have our soulmate the one that makes us whole…What if I told you all that was some bullshit? What if i told you that your soulmate and potential lifemate is a best friend, a friend or even an acquaintance? What if I told you romantic love is more misleading than genuine love for family and friends? What If I told you that an amazing friendship can surpass anything? What if i told you that friend breakups are worse than romantic ones? What if this whole blog was some bullshit and its 2:50am I should be sleeping?
Lots of “if”s turned to thoughts, turned to actions which transformed into habits…let that sink in.